Looking for non-punitive parenting tools to solve power struggles and other behavior challenges? Positive
Discipline Parenting Tools provides just that — alternatives to punishment that also teach children valuable social and
life skills such as self-discipline, responsibility, cooperation, and problem-solving skills. These skills help children
develop a sense of self-reliance and capability that will serve them throughout their lives.
There are many ways to use these cards:
1) In the middle of a power struggle, shake to see what card comes up. It may offer the perfect solution. Ask you child to shake and then choose which one works best for both of you—or keep shaking until you find one that does. Already you are focusing on solutions. What a great gift to teach your child.
2) Choose a card once a week and discuss it with you children.
3) When you are “losing it,” take a deep breath and a little time out to choose a card and get some inspiration for making a connection with your child before correction (an important Positive Discipline concept.)
You’ll notice that none of these tool cards include any kind of punishment, rewards, or praise (all extrinsic motivators that research keeps showing over and over again do not work). These are tools that provide intrinsic motivation to develop self-reliant children that become happy, successful, contributing members of society. Every tool meets all of the Five Criteria for Positive Discipline:
- Helps children feel a sense of connection? (Belonging and Significance)
- Kind and firm at the same time (Respectful and Encouraging)
- Effective long-term
- Teaches valuable social and life skills for good character (Respect, concern for others, problem-solving, cooperation)
- Invites children to discover how capable they are (Encourages the constructive use of personal power and autonomy)